WEATHER CHANNEL CAUSES CHAOS

OKAY, LET’S GET THIS OVER WITH: This is for those alphabetical alliterative Armageddon-ites at the Weather Channel, who are already talking the wrath of Winter Storm Rocky before Q has even landed: 

Winter Storm Stanley Stirs Up Livingston.
Winter Storm Tetley Teases Teaneck.
Winter Storm Ulysses Upsets Union City.
Winter Storm Vampire Ventilates Virgin Islands.
Winter Storm Walt Decomposes Disneyworld.
Winter Storm Xerox Copies Calamity.
Winter Storm Yogi Bears Big Blast Boner.
Winter Storm Zero Eliminates Everybody. 

Now, STFU and bring spring already.