Tuesday, September 24, 2013

OVER EASY WITH EFFECTS ON THE SIDE

DEAR PHARMACEUTICAL AMERICA:

Something is amiss when we watch your 60-second commercials for a new drug, and 52 seconds are devoted to "possible side effects."


I can't get past watching your actors cavorting carefree on a beach while I'm also listening to how Intestoplex could cause their explosive nocturnal diarrhea and yeast infections.

Surf's up.

Sunday, September 15, 2013

OH LITTLER TOWN OF BETHLEHEM

It's been well-said that "Politicians, whores and ugly buildings all get respectable if they live long enough."

Interesting, yesterday, as I stood on the street with my camera, watched the demolition and listened to my fellow locals mourn the loss of the Jackson Block, our Bethlehem, NH landmark.  For years, it's been an "eyesore" and an "embarrassment" and "something that should've fallen down or been taken down years ago."

Now, it's a "loss of our heritage."

I'm with George Carlin:

"When you die, your approval curve goes way up."




Thursday, September 5, 2013

NIGHTINGALE DIAMONDS

IF NURSES WORKED LIKE MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL PLAYERS, we'd only have to pitch (work) just over half our shift, then another nurse could "relieve" us, and we'd still get paid for the whole thing.  

Or, when we stepped up to the plate (bedpan), and only emptied it 4 times out of 10 ...

Or, if we also didn't get a hit (give medications) to 6 out of 10 patients, we'd still be considered super nurses.

And, we'd get free uniforms, only have to work half the year and our average pay would be $3 million even if we're out sick.

Play ball.